Where In The World Is Evan?

Breaking Up (Again)

Posted by Evan on Saturday, 17 September 2005 at 5:27 pm

When Sergio and I were returning from Tibet my plans and expectations for my arrival in Chengdu were quite simple. I was going to roll into town, see a bunch of friends, score some ecstasy, and get laid. Unfortunately the reality of the situation did not live up to anyone’s expectations–Dong Dong’s family had insisted she never see me again, no one had any ecstasy, and I generally felt out of place returning to a city I’d lived in for almost 6 months and having to stay in a crappy hostel (my own fault considering relations with my former employer precluded staying with Jon or Richard).

When Lisa showed up at the hostel I saw this, at first, as an opportunity to salvage part of my plans. Within ten minutes we were making-out in the luggage room, but after going out to dinner all of the crap that had plagued our earlier relationship came back to the fore.

A couple of days later, after several pointless run-ins, Lisa and I tried again. We went out for dinner and then had a long and interesting talk about our past relationship. She genuinely seemed to have gained a greater insight into her erratic and irrational behaviour during her time in Australia, and I became convinced that things could work between us. The ensuing week that we spent together was nothing short of fantastic. I still felt uncomfortable staying in the hostel, and nervous about moving to Zhuhai, but in terms of our relationship we’d never been so happy or so intimate.

When her and Sergio came to see me off at the station she cried in my arms and I practically begged her to come and visit me in Zhuhai, which she said she would do. As the train departed the station the combined feelings of loss from leaving Chengdu, and all the people there whom I’m close to, had me crying for the first time since I left home.

Two days later, while I was still on the train, Lisa sent me a message telling me that she now had a mobile phone, through which we could keep in contact. As I struggled to settle into my environment in Zhuhai I made several phone calls and sent countless messages to Lisa. She also often told me that she missed me, and when I mentioned considering coming back to Chengdu she encouraged me to do so.

On the sixth day, however, I happened to ask Lisa why she suddenly chose to get a mobile phone–as it had been an issue between us in the past that she hadn’t had one. It was at this point that she announced that after I had left Chengdu she had felt so lonely staying in the hostel that she desperately wanted to move out. As such she took the first available offer, which naturally was from some arsehole, Pierre, that she’d been seeing before we got back together, and that the phone was his.

So to recap, while I was still on the train from Chengdu (I didn’t arrive in Guangzhou for another couple of hours), Lisa moved in with another man and then used his mobile phone for the next six days to send me dirty messages and tell me how much she missed me. Fucking unbelievable!

Following this revelation we had a long and emotional conversation which was cut short when I ran out of credit on my pre-paid mobile. In the morning, when I could buy credit, I called her back and sent a message, but got no response. At 8:30 pm I called again, only to find her laughing and having a great night out with Mark (the new teacher at my old school) and Sergio. When I asked why she didn’t call me back she said that she was too busy, and then launched into a tirade about how she couldn’t do anything right in my eyes and that she was damned whatever she did.

When elaborating on why she was too busy to even text me back she mentioned that she was still living with Pierre and didn’t want to have such a conversation in front of him. In light of the impressive theatrical performance she’d put on the night before–crying, begging for forgiveness, wishing she could roll back time, etc–I was amazed that she had the nerve to sleep with him again and then tell me that she’d done all she could to make the situation better and that I needed to decide if we could still be friends.

Calling her a “worthless fucking bitch” wasn’t the restrained and rational response that I was aiming for, but it certainly did convey my feelings.

Country: China

Pingback from whereintheworldisevan.com » The South China Gold Coast

Posted on Friday, 23 September 2005 at 7:23 pm

[…] A rather upsetting element of my transistion to Zhuhai is covered in Breaking Up (Again), however, a lot of other things were happening at the same time. […]

Comment from Jon

Posted on Saturday, 1 October 2005 at 3:29 pm

Lets have a go at this quote thing that you always try and stitch me up with.

I generally felt out of place returning to a city I’d lived in for almost 6 months and having to stay in a crappy hostel(my own fault considering relations with my former employer precluded staying with Jon or Richard).


(my own fault considering relations with my former employer precluded staying with Jon and relations with Richard precluded staying with Richard).

Only fucking. Lanzhou is a shithole, you were right, so at a loose-end. Got your Chengdu groove back yet?

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